5 Common & Surprising Reasons Guys Distance Themselves From You
“So you’ve just met a great guy who you feel like you have a great connection with. He’s attractive, smart and fits into your definition of “tall, dark and handsome.” You’ve probably been speaking with him for a while, but you’ve noticed something quite strange about him—the time it takes for him to respond to your messages and return your calls doubles with every interaction.”
He’s pulling away from you isn’t he? What could it be? Is it the way you carry yourself? Your fashion sense, or the way you eat? Or maybe you had bad breath on the first date?!
1. You Wouldn’t Let Him Pay/You Expected Him to Pay
During the courting process we’ve been conditioned to believe that men should be providers and women are caregivers and nurturers. This division of labor between the sexes has become a staple in nearly every walk of life, most notably, during the courting process.
Despite society’s attempts to abolish traditional gender roles, many men still feel more inclined to “foot the bill;” as it is still considered a good gesture, and does nothing but increase our chances of being in your good book.
However, something I’ve noticed men despise about their dates—it’s when their date expects them to pay for the meal, because they’re male. This doesn’t just pull them away, it turns them off.
This problem manifests itself if they feel like you haven’t appreciated their efforts. Don’t be thatgirl. The first impression you give is usually the only impression you’re remembered for, especially if it doesn’t get past the first date. Most men aren’t so keen to fund the lifestyle of someone they’re not sure what their intentions are: “What exactly does she want me for me?” Or, “Is she only after me for my money?”
On the flip side, some men will pull away just as much if their date strongly insists that they must pay their own share. As callous as this may sound, most of us have egos bigger than Mt. Kilimanjaro, yet are as fragile as a fly. Trying to assert dominance in this situation may make your date run away. Even though you’ve done nothing wrong.
Yes, I confess… we can be just as confusing to you, as women are to us.
How to avoid this: don’t make the novice mistake of bringing no money with you, more importantly than that, ask him how much money you should bring. His response will show you whether he intended to pay for the meal from the get go, or just for his share.